Thoughts on the world

My best love c--)

2010-12-06T07:11:00.001Z

hi, a few days ago, I purchased several Christmas gifts from a
bussiness company, because all products in discount season, very
affordable, you can go to brow: mobilesoso.com, if you find
appropriate item, decorating your Christmas Days.

*--)

Cage fooball

2008-01-30T09:34:00.000Z

Two years ago, we shot a load of footage at Soul Survivor 2006, playing cage football, but never got round to editing it into something good. well here it is.
Look out for Mr T taking it round everywhere, the Crocodile Dundee cow calming trick, the 2 guys on the same team competing for the header and the goal off the wall and knocked in.

Tailblazer

2007-12-24T10:06:00.000Z

Greetings!

I bring good news!
My creator is returning,
I am returning,
the end is here!

All the bad stuff in the world will vanish, all the unfairness, lying, greedyness and hate will end.
I am on my way right now, lost in the great emptyness that you call 'space' as you have no real idea how fantastic it really is. I prefer to think that I am part of the glactica, as your Greek ancestors called it, the great splash of milk across the sky, lighting up the otherwise empty void.
I am part of the stuff in space that occasionally burns bright, illuminating your sky for weeks or months inspiring awe and reverence to the greatness of our creator. I am only simple stuff though, rocks dust, ice and frozen gas. I am only made from the same stuff you are, except the creator has never made me alive, only you have that priviledge. I am a simple comet with no great features. I have no great mass like a star, boiling with super hot nuclear reactions, constantly burning all consuming fire in a deadly rage. Neither am I like the super massive black hole, that hateful old bitter star, whose jealousy for what once was, remembering its wonderful glory, sucks all life out of a galaxy, until it is dry and the old star is suitably satisfied that no one else can have any glory either. All I can do is reflect other's glory, and illuminate the wonderous things occuring around us.

I have been around since the beginning of your solar system, when things were spectacularly eventful. The darkness was lit with explosions, wonderful cataclysmic firework displays of genius, forming nine planets, all very different in character, each with its own purpose, the third being the most important. Those were the days that the creator was about alot, fussing over everything, making all just so. Who knows what plans he was following, what he was building for?

One day he came and acually talked to me, he gave me an important duty. He said that one day he will live on the third planet from the sun, so he could rescue its people from their bad ways. My job was to let everyone on the planet know that he was coming and where he was arriving. He told me to fly deep into the dark place between the solar systems and return at the time of his arrival on earth.

Millions of years later, when that time came I was really clsoe to your solar system once again, hurtling towards your sun. As I approached Pluto, I started to heat up and managed to shake off some of the dust that had gathered over the years, leaving a tail of wonder across the solar system, like an intergalactic slug. This was easily visible to those who looked up at the sky, to those who were watching and waiting. Apparently some astronomers were watching me in the Persian empire. They saw where my tail was pointing and followed my path across the sky, travelling almost half way round their known world to see what important event on earth was going to occur. How amusing it must have been to see the creator of everything, as a little baby.

As I left the Wetern edge of the solar system to re enter the galactica, the dark bit between solar systems, I got cooler and refroze, the gas and dust stuck to me once again and my tail disappeared. I was much smaller as I am now still, having shaken off a lot of dust. But what an honourable way to lose dust. Think about me next time you empty your hoover!
I am going away now for a while, but I will be back. My purpose is still to let people on earth know when the creator is coming. I will return when the creator comes back and this time will be my last, dying burning bright in the sky.

I think that there is a great possibility that I will crash into your planet, so that no one can ignore the creator this time. There is also the possibility that I will pass you gracefully by, lighting up your sky with a glorious finale of cosmic effects, losing the last of my dust and gas, and like you, I will die and join my creator at the end in heaven.

Gravity Hills

2007-07-16T21:54:00.000+01:00

Thursday was a most interesting day with some really bad stuff and some really good stuff.

The best bit of Thursday was rolling up a hill. Gravity hills are wonderful natural optical illusions where one appears to roll up toward a crest of a hill. Richard and I set off at 11:00 to find one of these hills in Aston Clinton at Dancer’s End Lane, presumably where a dancer met their end whilst trying to go up (or down) the hill. Richard was all for not going until Monday, on our day off, but why wait? Richard thinks “good things come to those who wait” but what better thing can we do today than roll backwards up a hill?

A view of Dancer's end looking down the hill (actually up it)

We drove down the road, skeptical about the whole thing, surely our eyes could not be fooled into being deceived about a hill? After a twist and a turn we went down a hill and arrived at a spot where we thought the place might be. We put the car into neutral and found out that we weren’t going down a hill, but actually going up it, we were rolling backwards. Weird. Things then got chaotic, our perception of up and down became distorted, we went to film things and were saying “then the car will roll upwards” realising that we meant downwards and had to resort to pointing where we meant. “ the car was pointing up the hill” well what does that actually mean “up” the real up or the pretend up… I even got into a state where the car was rolling up the hill and I thought, “no! the trick hasn’t worked, no one will be amazed by a car rolling up a hill, it must be rolling down instead” Something went badly wrong to my mind that day, but it was great fun.

A picture of Dancer's End looking up the hill (actually down it)

The really bad stuff is the way that some Christian’s in the local area are fighting and bickering over an issue, I think it basically comes down to two issues, control and mistrust. One thinks that the other is being irresponsible and trying to steal the rug from under the other, unable to realise the benefits that it will gain. One thinks that they are being pummelled into submission and question the other’s motives when quite clearly structures are already in place.

Also both think that they can do a better job than the other. I support both and feel torn between them, although the issue is centred around one decision I hope the right one is sensibly, humbly and compassionately made and everything falls into place for the sake of ruining more than one person’s time and jeopardising the good work that is going on for many.

Think Smaller, Aim lower, Give up, have a cup of coffee

2006-11-29T22:56:00.000Z

Thought this video was fantastic, just the kind of motivation we need. Thanks to Alan Charter for leading me to this.

Best sign of the summer

2006-10-28T20:13:00.000+01:00

2006-10-28T20:11:00.000+01:00

Random Art?

2006-07-05T19:03:00.000+01:00

I stumbled upon this website and this led to a number of important questions that I had to answer.
I often have seen art as a bit of a waste of time and appreciate art with an important message, intrinsic beauty or a humerous twist, rather than something which is pointlessly profound or something trying to be art for art's sake. Some of my favourites have been the 'light switch', Dali's "Christ of Saint John of the Cross" and Marcel Duchamp's Mona Lisa. While I understand the rules of art as valuable tools to compare artists and works, addressing themes and aiming for improvements, I don't see the point of art for serving these rules, i.e. art for art's sake, 64 Bricks.
In "the Decay of Lying", Oscar Wilde states that "Life imitates Art far more than Art imitates Life"
The following article shows that life, perhaps, if not imitating art, is a little worried by it and unsure where actually to draw the boundaries as they don't know what it is. The origin of the piece is actually about a stolen statue whose plinth has become a piece of art as well.
I often recall people telling a true story and finishing with, "they couldn't make that up even if they tried" , well, knowing many mad films, books and tall stories, I bet they could.

The Times, June 26th, 2006

THE SEVEREST ART CRITICS? WELL, IT’S USUALLY THE GALLERY CLEANERS .

Damien Hirst’s Painting-By-Numbers, an installation comprising ashtrays, half-filled coffee cups and empty beer bottles, was binned by a cleaner in October 2001. Emmanuel Asare, cleaner at the Eyestorm Gallery, said: “As soon as I clapped eyes on it I sighed because there was so much mess. I didn’t think for a second that it was a work of art — it didn’t look much like art to me.”

People walking past the Tacheles art gallery in Berlin in December 2002 assumed that a suicide victim was a piece of performance art. They delayed calling the police because the 24-year-old woman had jumped from a gallery window.

Cleaners scrubbed a lavatory in the Arches art centre in Glasgow in February 2005 only to discover that the stained walls and paper-covered floors were part of an installation by the artist Angela Bartram.

A dropped wallet reportedly became a temporary exhibit when Tate Modern opened in 2000. When the owner returned, he had to squeeze past a crowd and, when he picked it up, was berated by an attendant for touching an exhibit.

Gustav Metzger’s Recreation of First Public Demonstration of Auto-Destructive Art, a transparent binliner stuffed with paper and cardboard, was also the victim of a cleaner when it went on display at Tate Britain in August 2004.

Well back to the original concept of random-art.org that made me think about art.
Is the programme 'random art' really random, or is it constructed? Was the programme left to its own devices and it concieved of the art? No. The viewer is still made to appreciate or dislike the artist, even though it is claimed to be random.
What about a system of randomly entering commands into a computer until things appeared. Would the blue screen of death become art?
I think current artistic thinking on 'what is art?' boils down to "art is what people might think art is or isn't" So the less I say on this matter, the better. If I say it isn't, then someone could disagree and say it is, then it is a conroversial piece of art. If I say it is, then de facto is art in my mind" Albeit not a very valuable piece, and not a very good one either, but somewhere could make an obscure ironic statement to someone, especially when programmers put comedy bits of programming into the blue screens themselves, like "s*** happens :>". Which I think sums up the art world, and the retort would be "but the good s*** floats to the top"

Fleas Flee

2006-06-13T11:07:00.000+01:00

As I write this I am in a world of chemicals, my presence in this room is destructive on all other inhabitants and I feel like their nemesis. I am their reason, if not for living, but for their presence here, also I am now responsible for their deaths. Much as our universal position as humans is, I am acting as judge, jury and executioner on a small piece of god’s planet tonight, by his grace for my own selfish ends. My room has become infected by fleas and I have decided to do something about it after a ring of quite itchy bites appeared on my stomach. I feel quite guilty for killing the poor things, I suppose I brought it upon myself, I got rid of the spider’s webs, evicted the wasps and fraternised with the creatures that brought the fleas into contact with me in the first place, now I am the victim, which as a living creature, we hate being. I have turned the tables.

The flea’s culture probably now half expects an apocalypse of such a kind. Their prophets have been predicting Armageddon (the happening, not the place) for some time, confronted by a dismissive population. They refused to see the signs, that species around them had died out, their climate had changed and their environment which they had damaged too much of, was fighting back. Fleas have been through many apocalypses before and had to recover from them, but what if this is the one which none will survive? What will happen to the 100s that die, will they learn from the lessons about their environment, have I been affected too much by the flea poison? Am I over-analogising? I’ll let you decide.

A follow up to the Aylesbury/Baghdad/Kabul reference from The Mirror.

2006-06-08T22:19:00.000+01:00

I found this article on Indymedia.org.uk, it seems Aylesbury isn't so different from these places after all, see the quote below.

"A different protest venue and a gentle warm up for the Bush visit.

Aylesbury Vale Friends of the Earth are planning to topple a Bush statue in Aylesbury Market Square to protest against the dumping of Kyoto. If you fancy a new protest venue and would like to raise the profile of environmental issues in Buckinghamshire your support would be welcome. Will hopefully be a gentle warm up to a week of protest. Hope this doesn't clash with any other events."
http://www.indymedia.org.uk/en/regions/oxford/2003/11/279956.html
I love the anarchic 'bring down the system!' albeit 'as long as it doesn't interfere too much' and "hope this doesn't clash with any other events", typical Friends of the Earth. Did they go ahead with it in the end? I heard nothing, saw nothing, perhaps it was a cover up?

Don’t overfeed your fish

2006-05-05T22:03:00.000+01:00

My brother keeps goldfish as pets. Why? I have never understood the attraction of keeping goldfish. They don’t do anything. They are pointless, especially since my brother is not even here to feed them or clean them out, so his pleasure from them is even more limited. What can you do with goldfish to make them interesting…?

Anthropomorphic personification does help to make it more interesting to me. For example, today they were fed not only once, but twice by me and mum. What are the terrible consequences for this heinous crime? Probably none, if we do this more often, we will have to buy more fish food. The fish might get a bit bigger or fatter. No one will die. But what if they did? What if that morning one of the fish was saying to the others, no you should swim clockwise instead of anti clockwise, so they all gave it a go (obviously, because fish have round faced clocks and watches in their advanced culture, supported by a complex language based on oral communication and have concepts such as religion and existence taught to them as eggs before being deserted by their parents). Then they were fed twice, and by unintended consequence a new religion was started and caused a major war in the fish tank, causing the death of one of the fish and a new religious sect of renegade fish. Sadly this sect, although very wrong about its precept would have an advantage of survival over all other fish, aswell as a vital flaw that would eventually wipe it out. The massive advantage is that it dared to believe something different, something radical which is beyond comprehension. The vital flaw is the pure silliness of the belief and the total lack of understanding which went into it in the first place, allowing the creature to place its entire life upon a very stupid and inconsequential hypothesis.
This cult is now a radical flight in the face of the fish religion, however its impact will stay limited because of the limited opportunities to evangelise. So don’t over feed you fish.

More lord of the rings photos

2006-04-15T11:03:00.000+01:00

More Lord of the Rings Party Photos, from Mark.
Just click on the link below. Its a slightly dodgy link as sometimes it does not work. But if at first you don't succeed, try and try again.

http://www.srcf.ucam.org/~map47/gallery/steve

"My goodness these photos are ridiculous"

2006-04-09T20:58:00.000+01:00

"My goodness these photos are ridiculous"

Marc Bowlan arrives with Perregin Took

2006-04-09T20:57:00.000+01:00

Marc Bowlan arrives with Perregin Took

A blowing Blowing

2006-04-09T20:55:00.000+01:00

A blowing Blowing

Mark the Cheeky Chappie from near Newcastle

2006-04-09T20:53:00.000+01:00

Mark the Cheeky Chappie from near Newcastle

2006-04-09T20:51:00.000+01:00

For the benefit of viewers, Mary points to the ringbearer when wearing the ring to demonstrate the nature of invisibility

The heir of Esildor is put in his rightful place, on the throne of Gondor

2006-04-09T20:49:00.000+01:00

The heir of Esildor is put in his rightful place, on the throne of Gondor

2006-04-09T20:48:00.000+01:00

The fellowship gather around a fire

A before and after of Aragorn

2006-04-09T20:46:00.000+01:00

A before and after of Aragorn

"Do you remember how long ago we last did this?", "It pains me to think about it"

2006-04-09T20:44:00.000+01:00

"Do you remember how long ago we last did this?", "It pains me to think about it"

Friends drinking in the Green Dragon

2006-04-09T20:42:00.000+01:00

Friends drinking in the Green Dragon

I wonder what Shampoo Gandalf uses?

2006-04-09T20:39:00.000+01:00

I wonder what Shampoo Gandalf uses?

Llegolas and friends in the Green Dragon (if it were on offer would he order a Strongbow?)

2006-04-09T20:36:00.000+01:00

Llegolas and friends in the Green Dragon (if it were on offer would he order a Strongbow?)

Friends stick together

2006-04-09T20:33:00.000+01:00

After a bizarre glue accident, one wise cracking doctor makes light of the painful situation noting that friends should always stick together.

Headlight

2006-04-09T20:30:00.000+01:00

In the middle we have the new ergonomically designed spotlight, designed in the Mines of Moria, available at all good Lighting Companies

A mischievous hobbit senses that the exploding trifle had the desired effect.

2006-04-09T20:28:00.000+01:00

A mischievous hobbit senses that the exploding trifle had the desired effect.

Amy and Helen hide cheese to nibble for later.

2006-04-09T20:25:00.000+01:00

Amy and Helen hide cheese to nibble for later.

Some guys

2006-04-09T20:23:00.001+01:00

Its not that these guys didn't dress up. Meet Nosho the trendy Hobbit that didn't do adventures and Thelma the helper at Bilbo's leaving party, (she did the dishes)

Steve's Lord of the rings party

2006-04-09T20:23:00.000+01:00

All the Norths gang up on poor little Jon

2006-04-09T20:20:00.000+01:00

All the Norths gang up on poor little Jon

Full House, The Extension

2006-04-03T10:33:00.002+01:00

Well, what a weekend.
Not too many injuries that were too serious. Jamie Bisley in the face with a Rugby ball, Mark Chappell with mild concussion on an obstacle course, a number of people were sick, but I think everyone enjoyed it.
We chased aliens around the park, built our own friends and mascots and looked after them more than our fellow humans, (and leaders), we built a huge bonfire and played lots of wide games, dealt with HM customs, the food was great and rooms very comfortable.
And despite all this we still had a lot of time for praise and worship, as you can see on the video.
The best quote of the weekend was from Claire,

"right, the kids have gone, where's the beers?"

or possibly from Rich Edwards

"Well in scouts we just used to piss in the fire... Oh are you still filming?...I'm sorry...by the way my name's Paul Tester"

So enjoy the video, those who I promised that I would out it on line for their delectation.

H20

2006-02-25T18:03:00.000Z

This being the chemical make up of water. Incidentally it is also the name of a social event for Christians at Aylesbury Grammar School, ran by Aylesbury Vale Youth for Christ. It was a fantastic evening, with two live acts, ACBC and Ben and Kyle, a disco with Dave Ackroyd and lots of silly games. I hope was enjoyed by all.

This link will take you to a video of some of the Gig
However it is quite poor quality sound and vision.
I can't do anything about the camera work, but can E-mail you Mp3's of most of the tracks if you would like, better mixed off the sound desk. Leave a comment at the bottom with your name and E mail if you would.
I suppose I could burn a CD for a fiver each if you would like.

Observations on rail passengers

2006-02-02T14:16:00.000Z

I work on a railway in the mornings and there are some of the interesting types of people I meet.

The School run dads.
These people, all men, are dropped off at the train station by their wives quite early in the morning. Not unusual you might think, however, it is their behaviour in relationship with their wives which is. They are subordinate to them, their wives will usually ask them if they have forgotten anything and suggest any items which they might need during the day. Generally, the wives will be casually dressed, as, if not on the way to work but to go home again, to go out to work perhaps at another time. This image is compounded by the presence of school children in the car, as the efficiency of the journey is improved, making one trip for the mother, even more if the children are going to school by train. Once again the mother reigns supreme in the car, all departees must give their formal sign to the mother when they go, a hug, a kiss or the groups participate in a complex display of hand shaking, hugging and kissing, if more than one person is departing. The one nod to the male sense of responsibility in this situation is the driving school run dads. These dads do the same as above, except they are allowed the small responsibility of driving the car to the station, where the wife takes back the responsibility, probably saving the family £4.00 in car park charges.

The car joggers.
These people, usually in the small villages, use the newspaper stand in the station as their local newsagents, not having one of their own. Early to mid morning, between 0800-1030 these people arrive at the station, pull up in their cars, hurry through the ticket office and to the newspaper stand, then back in their cars and away. These people are car joggers, as usually they are dressed in sports attire, whether ready to go to the gym or just to go home to be comfortable and lounge, enjoying the morning paper. None of these people I see are fat or overweight, so they must get some exercise somehow, however it is not though walking to buy a daily paper. Do these people realise the amount of pertrol they are using? Would it not be cheaper to have one delivered to their door, instead of having the hassel of driving to buy a paper? I have nothing against them, they are usually friendly enough and as regulars I appreciate their custom to the newspaper stand.

The post rush hour commuter
These people are businessmen and women who on the whole are working flexi time or going into London for a midmorning or lunchtime meeting. Therefore they can afford to be relaxed in their approach to work and life in general. Usually travelling to London, they typically are more polite than rush hour commuters and have a more favourable outlook on the train system. I admire these people and wish that more companies would employ people like these as they make my job easier, without the aggravation of London employed people.

Crapper snappers

2006-01-24T13:29:00.000Z

The other day I was walking to a meeting and in a bit of a hurry, and stood in a pile of dog poo. It was disgusting and the smell still hangs around my shoes, even though I have washed them. As there is a number to call to inform the council about illegal fly tipping if you see a car or van doing it, a similar system could be set up for naughty dog walkers. However the evidence will be harder to prove preventing it from being pursued in the criminal courts. So I propose the setting up of a naming and shaming programme. It would work something like this, a person sees a dog walker not picking up their dog's poo, takes a picture of him and the dog and the offending evidence. These pictures are then sent to an email address or texted to a number and posters of the offender are posted up around the park or public area, declaring their crime. Out of shame they might stop their nasty habits, or switch their walking path out of embarrassment, eliminating them from the area anyway.

Rolf Harris and the queen

2006-01-05T17:03:00.000Z

Just an observation, but when Rolf Harris was commissioned by the BBC to have a portrait of the Queen done, Rolf chose quite an unusual colour for the Queen's dress, she doesn't often wear a colour such as this, so why did he choose this colour. Normal people will instantly associate this coulour with the Queen as it is on our £5 notes. Have a look.

Jamaica Signs

2005-12-27T17:39:00.000Z

Signs are great in jamaica, here are a select few.

Jamaica me arie

2005-12-17T13:39:00.000Z

Jamaica is really good, hot and I can't believe its nearly Christmas, the only thing to remind me is the random placed Christmas lights, in the American tradition, and the reggae Christmas carols occasionally played in the bars. Over the last week I have been travelling the north coast, from San Antonio to Ocho Rios. The highlights have to be snorkeling in the Carribean on coral reefs, with our guide Marvin, the paranoid android, (most Jamaican names are fantastically 1940s, Winston, Stanley, Ronald, Sydney etc.) Going into the Green Grotto caves, which have played a significant role in the creation of a Jamican national identity and having it brought to life. The food is really good and hot and spicy and sometimes the best places to go are the equivilant of greasy spoons in England, not the fancy restaurants, as the fair is less extravagant, but you get loads, and it is dead tasty.
Ocho Rios is a cruise ship stopover so every one asks, "are you from the boat?" and are surprised if you are not, but still try to sell you things. One of the downsides about being a tourist is that all prices are inflated especially for you and you are ripped off quite often, like being asked to pay for 'complimentary' drinks. Thank goodness we are not paying in US$ as the quoted exchange rate of Jamaican$ to US$ further increments the prices. Also interesting things to look at are not usually developed into anything to go around, like old forts, the old naval hospital or signififant buildings in towns, like 17th Century trading houses and great houses, thankfully there are exceptions, like Devon House which is marvelously used to great advantage for the local community. Oh well we are off to sit on a desert island and snorkel and swim. Happy Holidays.
We went on a strange Ex Pat tradition called a Hash on Sunday which involved running up and down mountains in the midday heat. Quite fun, we were half an hour late setting off as we had got lost on the way there, having been given directions that included a hotel which no longer existed, but finished half way through the field, not that its a race. After running all that way, the afternoon was finished off by drinking ceremonies and some food.

Charity Gig

2005-12-05T23:25:00.000Z

If you are around the area of Seattle...

Little Donkey?

2005-11-22T16:38:00.000Z

Slightly early, but as people start planning their nativities and school christmas pagents, can I highlight a popular mistake in our culture.

Little donkey, little donkey

on the dusty road

Got to keep on plodding onwards

with your precious load

Been a long time, little donkey,

through the winter’s night

Don’t give up now, little donkey,

Bethlehem’s in sight

Ring out those bells tonight

Bethlehem, Bethlehem

Follow that star tonight

Bethlehem, Bethlehem

Little donkey, little donkey

Had a heavy day Little donkey, carry Mary.

HERESY! HERESY! HERESY! HERESY! HERESY! HERESY! HERESY! HERESY! HERESY!
Little Donkey
Alternatively buy it if you disagree with me, so badly.
The existence of a donkey carrying Mary to Bethlehem is about as close to the Christmas story as naming Wensceslas as one of the wise men who visited the crib, or claiming that Jesus was born on December 25th. She was a pedestrian not a rider.

Having made clear that there was no Donkey, where does the myth come from?
Quite simply, the story of a donkey is a myth. It was part of one of the pseudo gospels, Pseudo-Matthew, basically a jolly good read based on the biblical story, written in the 9th century, not an insight into the life of Jesus by someone around at the time. Incidentally one of the same gospels which Dan Brown refers to in The Da Vinci Code. These are fictional and rejected by the church as wrong and misleading, basically just myth.

As Dan Brown seems so popular, he posits the arguement that because the church tried to destroy the pseudo gospels, the church had something to hide, that they were conspiratorially hiding the truth. Of course I prefer to think that they are, like Mr Browns book, just good fiction. These stories of couse need some inspiration, so where could they come from?

Isiah 1 verse 3.
"An Ox know's its master and a donkey knows where its owner feeds it, but the people of Israel don't know me, my people don't understand".
This prophesy is easily stolen to interpret into a part of the nativity, in the way that it popularises the animal's role in contrast to the others, like Herod, around the birth of Jesus to embellish the harshness of Jesus' birthplace and his humble entry into the world. His greatness as lord of the earth, animal and human, is also emphasised symbolically. Therefore the Donkey is included as a narrative aid to the nativity.

Zechariah 9 verse 9.
"Rejoice greatly people of Jerusalem, shout for joy people of Jerusalem. Your king is coming to you, he does what is right and he saves. He is gentle and riding on a donkey"
This verse highlights the role of the donkey as contrasting the run up to the birth of Jesus, to the run up to his death through prophetic similarity. (Eg. in Mark 11 verse 7) This would be successful and quite profound if it were correct, however it isn't.

Thinking of Donkeys and Christmas, can I refer back to Numbers 22 verses 21 to 30.
the story of Baalam.
"21And Balaam rose up in the morning, and saddled his ass, and went with the princes of Moab.
22And God's anger was kindled because he went: and the angel of the LORD stood in the way for an adversary against him. Now he was riding upon his ass, and his two servants were with him.
23And the ass saw the angel of the LORD standing in the way, and his sword drawn in his hand: and the ass turned aside out of the way, and went into the field: and Balaam smote the ass, to turn her into the way.
24But the angel of the LORD stood in a path of the vineyards, a wall being on this side, and a wall on that side.
25And when the ass saw the angel of the LORD, she thrust herself unto the wall, and crushed Balaam's foot against the wall: and he smote her again.
26And the angel of the LORD went further, and stood in a narrow place, where was no way to turn either to the right hand or to the left.
27And when the ass saw the angel of the LORD, she fell down under Balaam: and Balaam's anger was kindled, and he smote the ass with a staff.
28And the LORD opened the mouth of the ass, and she said unto Balaam, What have I done unto thee, that thou hast smitten me these three times?
29And Balaam said unto the ass, Because thou hast mocked me: I would there were a sword in mine hand, for now would I kill thee.
30And the ass said unto Balaam, Am not I thine ass, upon which thou hast ridden ever since I was thine unto this day? was I ever wont to do so unto thee? and he said, Nay." (He did not suddenly talk like a horse, but merely agreed that his donkey did not wish him to come to harm, and what a silly man he had been)

Are we too like Baalam, are we not following the word of God to what he desires?
Are we too busy and self conscious to see God's message clearly before us?
Do we need to look at God's message again and ignore our agendas, or else we may come to harm?
Especially around this Christmas which is steeped in tradition including origins from Christian, Roman, Celtic, Orthodox, Jewish history as well as current political and social fashions, should we re-examine what we do and why we do it ,so that this christmas we celebrate the Christian origin of the festival and not get too bogged down in other pointless ceremony.

So, spare the poor embarassed child dressed in grey tights and cardboard face mask and let pedestrian Mary walk alone with Joseph to Jerusalem. and get our message clear this Advent and Christmas.

Bluetooth humour

2005-11-16T13:55:00.000Z

How about a new invention. The bluetooth tooth. This would remove the need for those silly ear pieces which couriers always seem to wear. It would contain a tiny microphone which would pick up your voice and transmit it via blue tooth to your phone which would then transmit like a normal mobile. It would contain a dynamo to power itself, able to recharge as you spoke and chewed. You would then certainly look as if you are talking to yourself.
In addition you could have any colour of tooth you wanted, you could even have a Blue bluetooth tooth. At the moment, white is such a fashionable colour for teeth, so 20th century though. As opposed to the black and yellow, particularly popular throughout the 19th and 18th centuries. However in the future, the fashion may be to have an array of colours, perhaps to match your mood, so you could have a blue Blue bluetooth tooth.
Of course, you could would need some way of keeping the Blue bluetooth tooth clean. Apart from having your standard toothbrush, which would be, of course, on bluetooth, and would be contacted by the Blue bluetooth tooth when it needed cleaning, making a bluetooth tooth brush, this may also possibly be blue, making a blue bluetooth tooth brush. In addition, you would need a servicing brush, to clear the tooth of any decay or matter clogging the circuitry, which would possibly lead to a malfunction of the Blue bluetooth tooth. This would make a blue bluetooth tooth bluetooth toothbrush.
It is not impossible, but very unlikely, that Mr Bluetooth would own one of these, and if he was unhappy because his blue bluetooth tooth bluetooth toothbrush was not working properly a repair man would fix, via bluetooth, blue Bluetooth's blue bluetooth tooth bluetooth toothbrush.

Aylesbury, good place to visit?

2005-11-11T10:59:00.000Z

In my home town, Aylesbury, a defiant sweep of unity has gripped the population. A national newspaper article, actually reviewing the film Elizabethtown in the Mirror on 4 November 2005 compared the town directly to Baghdad and Kabul as places in the world which aren't worth visiting.

"There are certain places you probably don't want to visit. Kabul. Baghdad. Aylesbury. Now add to the list Elizabethtown, a nowheresville in Kentucky that's home to star Orlando Bloom's latest endurance test of a movie. Man, oh man, is this bad"

Firstly, George Bush doesn't seem to think so about the first two places. No, Aylesbury doesn't have any oil, just incase you are wondering. It is conveniently near Chequers, yes, but hardly worth visiting, much better to stay in the scenic countryside away from the centre of Aylesbury, chatting to the PM about world hegemony.

Secondly, despite its fascinating past and central place in national history, Aylesbury, I would have to admit, is much less worth visiting than Kabul or Baghdad, unless: you have relatives living there, you like Roald Dahl, are going to court (which you have no choice) or wish to look at the oldest courtyarded pub in the country, the King's Head.

However, this does not hinder the interesting, nay, unique place Aylesbury exists in the nation.

John Hampden, of ship tax fame, one of the 12 MPs who started the break between King and parliament which began the English Civil War.
The UK's largest drug haul, in value of goods seized.
The Great Train robbery, up until this year the largest armed robbery in the UK.
The town farthest from the sea in the UK, hence the first point, obviously.
The beginnings of the Para Olympic games. In the village of Stoke Mandeville which is part of Aylesbury. The smallest settlement to hold an Olympic event.
The start of the late, great Ronnie Barker's acting career.
Home of Jermaine Lindsey, one of the 4 suicide bombers on July 7th 2005.

Aylesbury is a reasonably good place to live, it is quiet and set in nice countryside, a good place overall. However this week has got me thinking whether it contains the nicest people, Captain Aylesbury's site is an example, briefly read the comments to his article if you can be bothered, you will see what I mean. Not captain Aylesbury, aka David Summer, our local newspaper's Editor in Chief, the man behind the mask, who I am sure is just a well meaning resident.

Can I now compare other similar places to Aylesbury which constantly receive stick, Slough and Bognor, to an extent, Torquay (from Fawlty Towers). These places have now grown a defiance, a character with which to defy the critical words of people like John Betjeman, silently, by their own successes, overcoming the comments with their own achievements. Can Aylesbury, please do that as well, or I am leaving. Another good comment that Edwards puts in his review which I think sums up Aylesbury's character. It "is so spectacularly dull, you keep wondering why". With all the potential for excitement and a thriving town Aylesbury continues to remain a boring place to visit and a quiet place to live in.

Unless, very unless, there is not only one Aylesbury in the world, there are infact 3. one in the UK, one in New Zealand, one in Saskwatchen, Canada. Could Edwards possibly mean one of these places instead. Both quiet, small colonial towns, in the middle of nowhere? Where nothing happens, just like the fictional place of Elizabethtown. Will now the Canadian and Kiwi residents put their arms up in anger of the insult done to them?

Apparently not, Edwards says he drives through the Aylesbury he talks about in the article, "to see relatives". Not a good reason to go to Aylesbury, bring on the bypass.

CHILL's Bonfire Party

2005-11-07T00:17:00.000Z

On November 5th was bonfire night. We hosted our local youth group's Bonfire Party, with Guy and slightly dangerous fireworks, however no one was hurt, Thankfully.

Above should be a link to a slide presentation of what happened that day.
Notice the guy's head is a globe, perhaps, a reference to the continuing threat of global terrorism facing Britian, or just that we didn't want to burn a football.
It crossed my mind that the differing fashions of a guy each year made the event of setting fire to him more relevent. I did not feel a patriotic urge, as one does when England or Team GB do well. instead it was more a relief, a sense of defiance. That someone 400 years ago was thwarted from destoying a peaceful institution, based on collaboration, honour and, yes ok, social unbalance, gross unfairness and religious persecution, but that it was done with a goal of life and civility, with an aim of order and allowing debate to flourish. As many journalists are pointing out again that the situation has not changed. Terrorist doctrine allows no compromise or discussion, but simply aims to destroy opposition, simply a position which is untenable to justify, tarring innocents with the same brush as the percieved villains.
Another strange notion I came across this Bonfire Night, was the percieved un-Christianness of burning a guy, in some way that it was blasphemous. This view may be based on mixing the so called pagan ritual of the burning man with the celebration of freedom. Burning a guy is not a religious statement, it is a political statement, celebrating the beginning of parliamentary debate, religious freedom and the ending of autocracy. It is no coincidence that the people meeting in that hall, were the people who seperated church and state, the Bishop Bancroft, who would hold the committees that would write the King James Bible, allowing England to be mostly free of religious persecution. Obviously belief is not entirely just political or just religious, but the political aspects of it, I don't think can be confused with an anti religious message.

Lookalikes

2005-10-27T22:36:00.000+01:00

As I was on the train today, I noticed several people that I thought I recognised but at a second glance, did not look anything like the person I thought they were. This made me think about lookalikes and impressionists. One makes an effort to look like a famous person, either naturally gifted with similar physical characteristics, the other sounds and charicatures like the famous person, generally more successfully than the look alike. Every time someone becomes remotely famous, lookalike agencies must fill up with applicants to emulate the new famous personality. As there are over 6 billion people in the world, there must be several people with a similar face to you, at least according to other people.
Many papers have look alike competitions in their satire pages. Papers like The Sun ask readers to send pictures of themselves in. Other more conservative, less exhibitionist papers like The Times run look alike competitions comparing celebrities, as the readers are far too modest to include themselves in the competition.
So I thought that I could step out and reverse the competition concept, to see if people recognise me and find out if there are any 'me' lookalikes out there. Its not a competition, as there is not prize except competitive satisfaction.
Just glance at my photo and see if I look like anyone you know then tell me via the comments option. I don't have to look particularly like the person as this doesn't stop most look alikes.

How do they shell corn on the cob?

2005-10-23T17:11:00.000+01:00

Over a most excellect lunch, containing, not surprisingly corn onthe cob, the question arose about how the separation of kernels from the cob(or ear) occured. It seems that this question has been pondered and researched already by the google answers guys.
The actual page is this http://answers.google.com/answers/threadview?id=145556
However below is a summary.
Firstly, the the corn on the cob is harvested. This is done either mechanically or manually but the whole corn on the cob and husk is picked. These are taken to the processing plant where a machine machanically slices off the corn.
The machines slice off the base of the ear, and remove the husk off the ear with rollers without
damaging the kernels.
"The husked ears drop onto a belt, and workers
inspect the ears and feed them tip first into the cutting knives. The 4 or 5 knives are mounted in a round holder which allows the knives to open up. The knives have a 90 deg bend so the tips, which are curved, are parallel to the cob and form a circle. They are very sharp, turn very fast, and open and close depending on the diameter and shape of the cob. They cut very fast, very cleanly. Cobs shoot straight though and go to the waste pile, the cut corn falls onto another
conveyor. Husks and cobs are chopped and made into silage for cattle feed. I worked several summers at a Green Giant processing plant, canning peas and corn. Only field corn and sweet corn seed is allowed to dry in the field before picking." Evidently some mechanical guides allow for the awkward shape of the corn to prevent too much from being sliced off.
Below is a picture of a 19th century corn cutting machine made by Welcome Sprague in Farnham, New York.
This feeds corn along a converyor belt into a series of rotaing knives which slice off all the kernels and with the motion of cutting off the kernels, twists the ear on its axis to allow the bit sitting on the belt to be shorn of kernels as well. It seem that this is one of the best methods of skinning kernels, although i am sure a gravity drop machine would be more efficient, removing the need of the initial conveyor belt enabling the machine perhaps to be hopper fed, and, via a griddle underneath the machine would conserve energy by simple sorting of ears and kernels.

What would Jesus Shoot?

2005-10-20T23:57:00.000+01:00

You talkin' to me? Then who else are you talkin' to?

You talkin' to me? Well I'm the only one here.

Who do you think you're talking to?

Of all the portrayals of Jesus, imposed on our cultural subconscious, this has to be one of the more funny, or sad images. Part of our perception of religion is made up of what we see it doing every day, how it relates to our daily intake of information and culture, usually most of which are not Christian. Every painting has a history and motivation from the artist which I think would be interesting to find out in this case. The other side of a painting is the audience. People's reactions are easier to find when put on-line as they are almost anonymous. These are easier to find out. Especially as a lot are on one site. This picture is part of the Ship of Fools website, and they are running a caption competition there at the moment. My entry you can see above.
What can you think of?

http://ship-of-fools.com/Caption/index.html

King James I on smoking

2005-10-15T10:27:00.000+01:00

James I was one of the most sensible kings of England. Not only did he unite the country with one bible, therefore ending inter necine conflict in the Christian faith, he had a view on smoking which many people have yet to realise today.
He thought that it was:
"A custom loathsome to the eye, hateful to the mind, harmful to the brain, dangerous to the lungs and in the black stinking fumes thereof nearest resembling the stygian smoke of the pit that is bottomless." 1604
A message perhaps that should have been written on old packets of cigarettes 300 years ago. Isn't it strange that the anti smoking lobby, with all the weight of scientific evidence, still provides the same message today.

Wind farm camoflage

2005-10-11T21:36:00.000+01:00

This century is supposed to be a century for renewable energy if we are to listen to the optimistic environmentalists among us, where we reject the scourge of the carbon fuels and look towards a future, harnessing natural forces, instead of natural resources. One of these such forces is the wind. Simply an old idea of windmills rehashed to make electricity, from the possibilities of more efficient technology.
These wind farms recive a lot of local opposition from locals a lot of this groundless nonsense, like claiming that low frequencies of the turbines might cause a health hazard. http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk_news/story/0,3604,1463589,00.html is a typical example of this. Note especially the statement, "It introduces an angular, lined and discordant visual impact into a landscape which is valued precisely because it is one of the few pieces left in the country where such development is noticeably absent" The Yorkshire Dales, particularly known for its dry stone walling (see this link http://www.keswick.u-net.com/ldwwf.htm to see it for yourself), a historically, angular, lined and discordant visual object much valued by those appreciating the heritage of the dales.
Unfortunately a legitimate downside of this new power generation is the size of the wind farms, both the prominance of them in terms of height, and in terms of number of turbines involved (cooling towers being roughly as tall as turbines, but not as numerous), which brings a lot of criticism from local groups or NIMBYs (not in my back yard, incidentally since when did a British person have a back yard? NIMAs (not in my area) never made it as Britain adopted yet another Americanism, back yard that is, not NIMBY as that definitely was British, in the 19th Century).
A partial solution to the problem has been to put them out at sea, but still these farms have come in for some criticism. An option for power companies is to colour the wind farms so that they blend in with the sky. Not the land, as some American states seem to think, A very difficult task if one is to take in the factors:

Distance from the winfarm.
Position of the windfarm in relation to the sun, and the time of day.
The weather conditions around at the time.
What people are doing at the time of seeing the wind farm.
The attitude of the population when looking at the windfarm.

From these factors it is possible to take in the averages of the factors to provide a solution that is best for the greater amount of people.

Firstly it will be neccessary to identify the maximum visual range from which you can see the wind farm, taking into account, geography, such as hills and the like.
Then, work out the distance from which the most mumber of people will regularly pay attention to the wind farm, not just glance at it, (e.g. not just those travelling through an area/ although those holidaying in an area would be taken into consideration, especially if it were in a place reknowned for its scenery). And the angles at which the farm will be visible, allowing the surveyor to quanify a sector analysis of the surrounding area. An idea would be to focus on population centres, and bias it towards groups most complaining about the scheme.
This gives an average distance and some dominant angles from which to work out where the wind turbines are most viewed from.
Then it will be worked out, from questionnaires in that catchment area, when people are mostly going to notice the wind farm. Probably, on weekends, when it is a nice day, a holiday, they are looking at the scenery, something which forces their attitude to the environment to change. Perhaps the proposal of another wind farm.
This information could then be used to form an average of when the wind farm is to be a most conspicuous object against the sky and therefore most visible. Obviously every placement will be different and lighting conditions, angles of the sun, visibility at those popular times are all changeable.
By photographing the sky, from those different places, determined by distance, angle and time, it is possible to work out the average colouration of the wind farm to make it less conspicuous on the land scape. By taking in the sky in each photo, looking at the most likely sky colours and patterns the turbines will be viewed most often against, it is possible to camoflage the turbines accordingly. In a variety of shades and patterns to break up their linear form in the sky.
Obviously the base stations and power distribution transformers should be kept either subterrainian or disguised by trees, an afterthought but quite a simple one really.

Hopefully this will help the cause of more environmentally beneficial energy sources, allowing their greater acceptance in countries unreceptive to their visual impact just yet.

Well the fuel protests failed, but what next?

2005-09-18T10:32:00.000+01:00

This week we definitely saw my predicted failure of the fuel protests in Britain. This was due to a number of factors.
1. Lack of active support, notably not from the farmers.
2. A stricter police handling of the situation, preventing total blockade of the motorway only allowing lorries on the outer two lanes, and a faster minimum rolling speed of 40 miles per hour.
3. Lack of popular support for three reasons
A. The fuel tax has not been raised so protest against the government was not an appropriate action.
B. By the time the protests happened, the price of petrol and diesel was falling. Several supermarkets, led by ASDA, announced price cuts.
C. Many people realised that businesses were in trouble anyway because of the high price of fuel and any further raises would have damaged the economy.
Interestingly the panic buying of the public increased the price of fuel higher than the effects of the protest. Has BP thought of setting up a secretive organisation which can in future threaten the nation's petrol supply?
The supply and demand problem is being identified by the chancellor as the cause of the rises. I would argue against this as distribution capability is near maximum at the moment, not helped by the destruction caused by hurricane Katrina in the Gulf of Mexico. It is not simply a case of pumping more oil through pipelines, but of expanding production. Here, several countries can take the initiative to gain greater exports. Russia is an obvious winner, with its economy heavily dependent on oil. Venezuela too can take advantage of the American market now the Gulf of Mexico production is decreased. If OPEC will not raise output, then these countries can take the initiative to respond more quickly to the demand.

What to expect in the future?
It has long been said that resource wars will be fought, or have been fought in the case of Iraq and Afghanistan, as the global economy seeks to cope with increased demand for resources and their decreased abundancy. These wars will rarely be military however. They will be economic and political in nature, possibly social as well. We can expect to see more actions against, firstly, governments to liberalise economic accessibility of resources, for example the fuel protests, if water availability decreases then the protests will be over water. Gas price rises also are indicative of a similar action. Notice last week how British Gas tried to sneakily raise prices while everyone was concerned with petrol, England had won The Ashes and it was a glorious summer's day, not the time to show pensioners complaining about, how they were they going to keep warm in winter?
Secondly this action against governments will transfer onto the international scale. Treaties often claiming to be liberal and free trading will be signed, aimed at guaranteeing resource supply and production. This will be done as part of the WTO but also as part of international organisations like the EU and NAFTA. Also treaties will be signed increasingly on behalf of these organisations. The United Nations will be reduced to a disater relief organisation, acting only when the econmic forces of the global economy fail a country. It will become a safety net catching those plummeting to destruction, or a sanctioning body for invasion to secure resources.
However, I do not think that overall that this will lead to global economic blocks of trade and resources. Different networks will be created controlling each resource. these will not consist of states, but of companies and their subsidiaries, states will aim at controlling these companies in their own borders but will lose more power than they have at the moment in trying to retain these company's sevices.
I do not see this future as being bleak. Other social factors will inevitably arise to change this economic pragmatist's view of the global future. The prediction is one according to the West, the way they will want it to be. However inspired opposition to this situation from countries such as India, China, a collection of African nations. A global civil society initiative possibly could radically change this as charities become increasingly organised to have impacts and campaigns world wide.

Hoo

2005-09-11T19:24:00.000+01:00

This afternoon, as I was reading the Sunday Times, I learnt about the Sri Lankan measurement of Hoo!. That is the distance a person can walk away from another person and still hear them shouting Hoo!. An entirely practical measurement, obviously for distance, although for travelling it would be quite impractical to measure. No this measurement has a number of uses which would be easy to establish in an otherwise difficult to measure way, using decible metres and reverbaration analysis.

For example, Is this a well insulated house? Someone could stand in the sitting room shouting Hoo. Upstairs someone could listen see if they could hear a noise. Estate agents could use this as a selling point for the property so buyers would instantly know if their desired property was Hoo compliable. A radio at an approprate volume could presumably also be used if only one person is viewing the house and the estate agent didn't want to play ball.

Equally http://www.stare.com/2002/weak14.html has established another use for it as a measurement to enable campers to remain in peace and quite, away from others.

Venues, when deciding when to use or invest in a public address system could use the measurement as a indication of the neccessity. Able to produce a map of the building indicating which were Hoo and which were not, a kind of Chinese Ying or Yang.

When allowing the kids to go out and play in the street, a parent could specify that the children could not stray more than a Hoo!s length from the house as dinner was not far away. This would allow a child ample freedom to roam as far as the feared, without incurring the the wrath of the parent, and maintain a tacit control over the child's movements.
Obviously as with all measurements in the west there is a desire to standardise them so that everone is even, for example, the roman cubit was from your little finger to your shoulder, so any roman lady wanting to buy some cloth would presumably send the tallest most gangly slave to market. This has often led to strange measurements being created, the candle or furlong for example. But the Hoo! has a great practical useage which has no equivilent in English and I call for it to be used in everyday language.

The Walter's Family Tree

2005-09-11T18:36:00.000+01:00

As the Walters's MSN domain area has closed after much lack of interest and input, I have put the family tree here. Any changes do please contact me and I will alter them. Recently, congratulations to Rebecca for her engagement to Dan, the party was excellent.

2005-09-08T15:42:00.000+01:00

This week a number of service and resource related issues have come to light in the Americas. Obviously the major issue the media is reporting is the projected oil shortage and the rise in the price of oil. Along side this interestingly Hugo Chavez, Venezuelan President has been in Montego Bay, Jamaica promising oil price concessions to Caribbean countries, meaning their oil will be reduced in price and also discussing further reductions if prices continue to rise. This appealing state of affairs for the Carribean will inevitably promote Hugo Chavez's prfile in the region, giving Venezuela a more favourable image, from the poor scenes of domestic insurrection in Caracas last year.
To coincide with this conference the Jamaican Labour Party called for road blocks to bring Jamaica to a standstill this Tuesday in protest of energy bills, bus fares and utility prices. It successfully managed to do so, on an island that seems to lilt readily into inactivity given a plausible excuse.
The National Fuel lobby has also declared that it wants to blockade the oil plants in Britain next Wednesday and we will soon know whether the all important farmers which constituted a major role in the blockade 5 years ago will join in. This action seems to be pointless in the fact that the government has not increased petrol duties and only by inflation has there been any fuel price increases. On an island where 'to carry on regardless' seems to be the attitude, seen after the bombings in London, and the subsequent failed attack, the success of next weeks protest seems to be very unlikely. The attitude of the nation does not seem to be receptive to this act at all. All good protests need a political appeal, and this planned protest has none of this, parliament are still on a summer break and the economic disruption to this nation would be far greater than any political or moral success of the National Fuel Lobby. The petrol supply to Britain is far too streched at the moment as it is, any more will cause longer lasting problems on the supply of petrol.